Is it? Or is it just me?
I hope its not just me.
There are days when is just seems like the fighting is incessant. There seems to be no remedy, no punishment or threat that will cease the endless arguments. Those are the days I may need a hot bath in the middle of the afternoon. Or I take advantage of "movie time" for the kids before lunch.
One particular day, my son (must be a boy thing) was picking on his sisters unlike anything I've seen. It's like he took pure pleasure in picking on them.
The girls had reached their limit and came to me to get their brother to stop irritating them. After I addressed the issue with my son and told him to leave his sisters alone, I turned to talk to my daughters.
I remembered my mom telling me when I was a little girl that if I just ignored my brother when he was picking on me, and didn't give him a reaction, that he would stop. And I still give that advice to my girls, because it actually works (most of the time.)
And I expanded the conversation to them and told them to be like a duck.
Let me explain.
I don't even remember where I heard it, but it stuck.
Letting negativity, hatred, curses- all the bad stuff, roll off your back. Instead of internalizing, personalizing and examining all the bad things that come our way that are said and done to us, just let it roll of your back.
You see, ducks secrete oil and then use their bills to distribute it throughout all their feathers that almost makes them "waterproof." Since oil and water do no mix, this oil makes it so that the water just rolls off their backs when swimming.
So, think of the water as all the negative influences in this world that surround us, and when you feel overwhelmed, attacked or the pressure to feel offended- make the choice to let it roll off your back.
BE A DUCK.
And that's exactly what I told my girls. When your brother is trying to get a rise out of you and pester you, just be a duck and let it roll off your back. Don't even pay attention to it. Choose to not let it affect you.